Tuesday, 3 May 2016

The Nourbal Resurgence

Just don't be a complete idiot out there and you'll be fine.
Lavar Kominius - The User's Guide To Low Security Space

I'm still in Tash-Murkon Prime learning the black art of market trading and trying to measure and subsequently exploit the intrinsic laziness of capsuleers and their consequent willingness to pay over the odds for stuff that is just two jumps away in Amarr at only a third the price.

I'm also lingering here in the hope that some of Empress-elect Catiz Tash-Murkon's affinity for capitalism will rub off on me.

This experiment has made me realise just how dead and borderline-economically-stagnant the Khanid Kingdom currently is. Tash-Murkon as a region is far busier and far more vibrant. All of this has presented me with a bit of a fork in the road. More on that another time...

The real reason for this entry in the journal: I was messaged again by the boss a couple of nights ago while I was in the quarters I'd arranged in the trade hub in orbit around T-M Prime II. It was another 'Urgent Press Release'. I don't think there was any kanar involved again (re: possible obliquely-sarcastic references to Darwinism's 'Glorious Leader'), but this was news of the alliance bagging an Ark jump freighter in Nourbal of all places, which is an uninhabited system without any orbitals or stations to use as safe havens in accordance with accepted jump freighter practice.

Not just that, but this Ark was virtually empty unlike the mythical legend it is named after.

In fact this incident was bizarre in so many ways that I'd rather let the boss explain:

[Gehi IX/Royal Khanid Navy/In-Station Associate Corporation Channel:[PHP1] mode:secure/yes/yes/none/recipients:0022866cassandrahabalu/EXTERNALNODE:TASHMURKONPRIMEII/visuals:attached]

[msg:02/5/118 - 1958]

[Subj: Happy Endings!]

To the Chief Press Officer Cassandra Habalu [FOR IMMEDIATE BROADCAST]:

Sometimes the universe is a strange place and can unexpectedly drop the most unusual events straight in front of you.

Glorious Darwinism leader Jzma was in Nourbal in the Southern Khanid region - well within our sphere of control - doing some exploration when he noticed an Ibis jump into the system and sit stationary near the stargate. Curious, he did some checking on the pilot's employment history and realised it was a brand new, recently-qualified capsuleer. This is a good sign because new capsuleers are often assigned to open cynosural fields for capital ships.

Nourbal is not a normal system to move capitals through as it has no station to instantly dock at when you jump in, so jzma called in [PHP1]'s Tryce Jaor in a hunting ship (Rapier) to sit in-system and watch out for cynosural beacons.

When Tryce arrived in Nourbal, the Ibis warped off. Soon after its Overview designator changed to “Piss Off”. Tryce cloaked and followed the Ibis to a planet and waited. After 20 minutes the Ibis gave up and warped back to highsec. Tryce initiated [Secret Mission #3489: Nourbal Resurgence] and pottered around the system, killing time.

After approximately 40 minutes the Ibis returned and Tryce dutifully tracked it and continued watching it. It was obviously keen to do something in the system.

BAM! After three minutes a cynosural field opened and Tryce warped (still cloaked at this stage) to 10km off the beacon; seconds later an Ark jumped into system!

Tryce decloaked, turned Sensor Booster and Microwarpdrive on and rammed the Ark. When his decloak timer had expired he warp scrambled and webbed the Ark and broadcast for help. Alliance capsuleers responded that they were ready, so Tryce opened a covert cynosural field generator allowing Darwinism Black Ops battleships to pour into the system and mob the hapless and doomed Ark.

It was ironic that an act of pure Darwinism was promptly punished by the capsuleers of the Darwinism alliance.

* * *

In space, no-one cares whether you scream or not. The above represents the pathos of ineptitude and the brutal shocking indifference of the universe to anything at all. If you've got enough ISK to buy a jump freighter, make sure you've got enough left to buy the instruction manual.

[PHP1] is recruiting!

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